A Fragment

Placidly sat on a chair in my kitchen, alone but not lonely, I look out of the French doors 

This whole morning speaks of quietude and calm neutrality 

French doors ajar, I hear an intermittent, soft rustling amidst the trees outside, as a breeze caresses the multitude of autumnal leaves 

My faulty tap slowly drips in the metal sink 

Contentedly I partake of my morning coffee ritual, hot liquid comforting my insides on this chilly October morning 

I gaze at my floorboards and admire the grain in the wood, patterns of nature frozen in time 

My mind tries to find some deeper meaning to all this, some philosophical substrate 

But maybe some moments don't require a deeper meaning, maybe this calm, ordinary morning is perfectly sufficient, sufficiently perfect 

This morning is complete and beautiful as it is, with the rustling of the leaves, the dripping of the tap, and the patterns in the wood 

A Fragment

In the sky an expanse of pleated gowns glowed pink, as the sun dipped below the horizon of my world 

Softly radiant, pastel pink, these chalky gowns were spread delicately yet majestically across a pale blue canvas 

Supremely elegant and graceful was the rendering of their existence, as though nature herself were the greatest artist and was showing off 

The pink hue of this dusky, chalky, pastel evening cast itself upon my surroundings, as my world bathed in its delight 

The city streets, the buildings, the pedestrians fluttering by, all were clothed in pink 

A Fragment

I stare at my face in the bathroom mirror and look into my weary eyes 

What have I become?
I no longer know how to live
I no longer understand what matters
Bereft of meaning, I am adrift in a cold, godless city 
 
Wandering the litter-strewn streets, hurried groups of workers rush past me
Faces buried in smartphones, dim light falling on vacant expressions 
E-scooters swerve by arrogantly in the sleepless, neon night 
Teenagers stand on pavements, pouting and taking pictures of each other "yaaass queen this one's goin’ on insta” 
A drunk man stumbles around, bellowing incoherently 
 
I do not share my feelings, my thoughts
I fasten my heart with silence and isolation
I am suffocated by my obstinacy and independence 
In a city constantly buzzing with noise and people and lights, I have never felt so alone 
Hopeless, desperate, I drink more whisky to assuage the pain 
 
Where are my childhood days, care-free and blissful? 
Where is my mother, who once held me in her arms? 
Where are the times when we reaped the bounties of our own seeds and tilled our own soil? 
Where are the gods and myths of old? 
Where are the moments of bravery, loyalty and self-sacrifice? 
 
I cast my thoughts to the past 
Though we have more convenience nowadays, something vital has been lost 
No longer do I see brave, chivalrous figures 
No longer do I see humbleness, authenticity, respect and connection 
Yet ultimately, I only blame myself for the way I feel 
 
I am the one who is wrong, tainted, depraved 
My existence is a mistake, an aberration 
I cannot be mended, repaired, put back together 
I am Humpty Dumpty 
Loneliness and suffering are my lot 
 
Again, I wandered the grimy streets 
Tripping over a curb, inebriated, I fell upon the unforgiving floor 
Lying on the street, lame and helpless, a soft, warm voice emerged from the night “are you okay, my friend?” 
Her blue eyes smiled at me and she extended her hand to mine 
Looking into my blood-shot eyes, she spoke again “you’re not alone” 

A Fragment

My cramped, little garden was a mess 

A funny smell lingered by the drain 

I sat alone, was I the only one to greet the morning sun? 

Wisps of cloud were scattered across a pale blue canvas 

Pleasant birdsong emerged from the silent, peaceful emptiness 

Nothing is more fertile than emptiness 

The bird continued chirping its pleasant song 

Other birds joined in, and the song became a beautiful chorus 

The birdsong was unintelligible to me, yet it meant everything to me 

The chorus continued a little longer, as the birds sang sweetly to each other 

The sounds emanated from the silent emptiness, then dissipated, only to begin again 

Somehow, in my cluttered garden, the eternal dance of creation and destruction, life and death, transformation and renewal, played out before me 

Was I the only one to meet this quiet, peaceful morning? 

Ahh, the warm sun felt nice upon my skin 

I'm grateful to be alive

Program Me

The society and culture in which we grow programs us to think in a specific fashion. Our view of reality is thus coloured by our socio-cultural environment. But many people are unaware that their minds have been programmed. Many people feel that their constructed reality is true and don’t think that another way of looking at things might exist. To understand the fact that there are multiple ways of looking at the world, some of which are radically different from others, is very beneficial.

Cultural and societal institutions want you to fall in line. They want to control you, so that you don’t wake up and think for yourself. Even institutions which deem themselves to be moral often just want to exert control over people, whether they are conscious of this or not. This is why I'm usually distrustful of overt moralising and sanctimonious behaviour.

Many live in what some might call “the matrix”. The matrix, to me, means a distorted copy of reality, built up over time by a specific culture. It can be wielded or encouraged by people in powerful positions to stop others from waking up and taking control over their lives.  

Socio-cultural conditioning stands between us and a more naked, independent, true understanding of how things work. Many people, it seems, go from birth to grave without perceiving things for what they are. Other people feel they perceive things clearly, because they have educated themselves about politics, for example, or have adopted “alternative” views about the world, but are just as much in the matrix as most others. Other people, again, may have educational qualifications and can learn to repeat knowledge in a robotic way, but still lack a fundamental awareness of how things work. This is why I don’t value things in the same way other people do. I don’t necessarily think it’s amazing that someone has got a first-class degree from the University of Oxford, for example. I would be more impressed if someone has created a beautiful work of art, regardless of whether this work of art was unpopular or not. 

It is difficult to determine what fundamental awareness means or whether some people have woken up or not. Waking up can’t be explained in the same way we explain what a chemical process is, but it involves a dissolution of socio-cultural conditioning and a consequently clear perception of how reality works. Ground-breaking artists often achieve this kind of awareness. Artists challenge the dictates of the culture around them when they create something fresh and innovative. They have cast their minds into the unknown and brought insights back into the known. They have made things conscious that were previously unconscious. 

Reality has a lot to teach us. We need to be receptive. We need to listen, observe and contemplate. We need to humble ourselves to the chaos and majesty of the unknown and integrate its teachings into our lives. We also need to realise that understanding is a continual process. No matter how aware you are, you always have something new to learn. 

Come Together

We should resist all forms of dogmatism and we shouldn’t be quick to judge others. When confronted with an issue, it is beneficial to consider this issue over time and to genuinely look at it from different angles. This might mean stepping outside of one’s algorithmic echo chamber and engaging in some form of research and contemplation, whether it simply be cross-referencing different articles or being mindful of one's feelings and thoughts. 

Unfortunately, I see too much polarisation and aggression in modern discourse. On social media, for example, people are quick to display their political views and opinions, wearing them like some kind of badge. This is probably done as a means to “fit in” and be validated by one's peers. It also seems that many people are hyperbolic online, probably in some vain attempt to be funny or entertaining. But such people usually end up contributing to a climate of division, hate and conflict. 

With online discourse, there seems to be a strong impulse to have rigid convictions about the world. But to understand things accurately is to be nuanced, fair and open to different viewpoints. Understanding things accurately, however, is quite difficult to do. It requires some amount of mental discipline and periods of discomfort. It requires you to genuinely question yourself and the world. Unfortunately, I don’t see enough people trying to do this. It isn’t fashionable, one might conclude, to have evidence-based and thoughtful views about the world. 

It is important to be aware of what is happening to us, psychologically, when we engage in online discourse. A lot of the time, people are trying to be accepted by “the crowd” and are emulating what they think is the correct or moral way of speaking. Other people are looking to gain as many likes and followers as possible, regardless of what they are uttering. In consequence, such people don’t think for themselves or form insightful arguments. For example, if there is any criticism of the dominant COVID vaccine narrative, many people online, usually liberal, use labels like “anti-vaxxer” or “science denier”, when in reality these labels are often untrue. But this, apparently, is the morally acceptable way of speaking about this issue. Similarly, people who voted leave during the EU Referendum were regularly labelled racist. People who use such labels don’t seem to realise that they are contributing to an already fractured, hateful world. There is something odious about sanctimonious behaviour. 

Russell Brand is one of the few commentators who, in my view, is trying to heal division and have thoughtful conversations about global issues. I think this is partly because he has an understanding of the effects of cultural conditioning and of deeper philosophical thinking. Deeper philosophical thinking means that he has a perspective on reality which is contextual and goes further than superficial, materialistic concerns. He also doesn’t fall into traditional political groups. He doesn’t come at things with an agenda or ideology, but assesses things with some degree of objectivity. We need more commentators like this. 

Tech companies and those in positions of power encourage unhealthy behaviour on social media. Those in power wanted us to argue incessantly about Brexit and Trump. Those in power want us to judge and ostracise those who don’t want the COVID vaccine. Those in power want us to stay perpetually divided and distracted. Those in power want to create hysteria about certain issues and want you to ignore other issues. Those in power encourage all forms of opinionated, judgmental behaviour, regardless of where you are on the political spectrum. Those in power will inflame and exploit any issue that keeps us divided, whether it be racial tensions, opinions on gender or positions on COVID. 

Unfortunately, from what I’ve observed, many otherwise decent people fall into this game of polarisation. They are sucked into a seemingly endless historical cycle. A cycle characterised by the phrase divide and conquer. I think they are sucked in because their weaknesses and emotional inclinations are tapped into by those who want to control and exploit. In order to combat division, ignorance and hate, more people need to cultivate thoughtfulness and true self-awareness.